I am looking for someone to date and eventually marry!

Ultimately finding someone is very simple: It’s just about being mutually attracted and excited about the possibility of building a life together (though you can also reach out for a less intense relationship!). The core requirements for that are:

1. We must be good communicators (Which in turn requires emotional competency, self-awareness, kindness, curiosity, and intelligence)
2. We must be mutually attracted (I’m straight)
3. And we must vibe

I hope you can judge communication from my writings and the kinds of things I do; attraction from my pictures. The vibe has to be experienced but unlike pictures, that doesn’t scale. So this document tries to convey my vibe through an explanation of my values, my life, and some anecdotes.

<aside>

Me on the internet

Show; don’t tell, as they say:

• https://x.com/artirkel
• https://www.instagram.com/jlriconf
• https://nintil.com/ </aside>

About me

I was born in Spain (Madrid) in 1992, then grew up in the Canary Islands to a height of 5’10’’. Eventually I went to college for too long, earning two masters degrees in mechanical engineering and aerospace dynamics.

My early career ambitions of doing actual rocket science got derailed by Life, and ended up in a series of jobs that started in the shop floor of an electric car company, an ended up in my current role as Head of Theory at Retro Biosciences. In between I worked at an AI startup that got acquired by Twitter and was offered a job to blog on the internet for 2 years by a bay area benefactor, which also got me my first O1 visa to come to the US. I’ve been a resident of San Francisco for 4 years and intend to continue residing in the Bay Area for the foreseeable future.

This is indeed my official pic from work, see it at retro.bio/team

To some people I’m most known as the blogger behind nintil.com, where I’ve written about all sorts of things for over a decade, from the economic history of the USSR to Alzheimer’s Disease to technological progress and metascience to AI risk. If my current life arc goes well, my next proudest achievement will be to have made a meaningful dent on human aging.

Values

What makes a person them? One could gesture at memories, the way they look, the things they like. Maybe people don’t really exist, if one has ripped deep from the Parfitian bong. I find some truth to the idea that people are to some extent their values. I definitely think so for myself: I identify with my values, the most stable part of who I am. What do you care about? How do you behave in the world? Here are my own

• Truth-seeking: I want to understand the world and those around me, including myself. This is probably the first value I ever consciously endorsed. My first answer to “what is the point of it all” was this, perhaps oddly as many people tend to reach for ‘happiness’, ‘understanding’.
• Honesty and transparency: I really try to only speak truths and to not decline questions about myself, my motivations, or my thoughts (unless there are concerns about other people’s privacy, promises I’ve made, NDAs, etc). I once stood in front of an audience exposed to arbitrary questions about what most would consider very personal matters and I answered them all.
• Reliability: I do what I say. I keep my promises, am not late to things. I keep most of my tasks in my calendar and have good awareness of what’s happening and what has to happen next.
• Integrity: I strive to be consistent in my actions across contexts. No matter what I’m doing, the same principles apply. If I’m being hypocritical I appreciate if I’m called out on it so I can be better aligned with what deep down I value.
• Self-improvement: Though I’m pretty great, I believe I can be even better and I appreciate when others help me, even when I don’t ask for it. Unsolicited advice is hereby declared solicited!
• Benevolent perspective: Sometimes people make other people feel bad for a variety of reasons. I think people are, deep down, good. When they are not, they are mistaken in some or another way. This leads me to react with curiosity, pity, and sadness (accordingly, case by case) instead of anger and hate. I don’t always act like this for I too am a fallible human but I try! This doesn’t mean I’m naive about people. Some people can’t be trusted, they say one thing and do anther or are manipulative!
• Politics: though I don’t think about politics that much in my day to day life, the labels libertarian, classical libertarian, or even anarchist of some flavor would fit me; you can read more in my blog about my views.

What my life looks like